Friday, January 15, 2016

Badass Bison Bull

In 2010 I took my family to Yellowstone. One day my son and I went to go on a hike while my wife stayed at the lodge. On the way back from the hike my son and I got stuck in a bison traffic jam. The Park rangers had halted auto traffic while the bison herd took over an entire lane (they were not "crossing" so much as using the road). I looked in the rear view mirror to see the alpha bull walking toward us. I am not exaggerating when I say that he was the biggest animal I have ever seen in the wild (not counting pilot whales). When I first spotted him he was passing a big tour bus, and the the top of his shoulders were as high as the windows on the bus. It was like seeing something out of the Ice Age. "Look at that monster coming our way! Get his photo," I told Andy. So my son picked up the SLR camera, rolled down the window, and poked the lens out in the direction of the gigantic bull bison.

Apparently this pissed off the bison because when he drew up parallel to us, he paused, turned his face toward my son, and went "BAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" His giant blue tongue stuck out of his giant bison mouth. The sound vibrated through the car. My son was suddenly and instantaneously in my lap.

He did not get a photo.

This is not the bison bull from the story. This one was a midget by comparison.

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