So I had some downtime and I was lying in bed and grabbed the remote and switched on the telly. There was some investigative show. But what grabbed me was that the guy narrating it was weird looking. He didn't appear to be wholly real. It was as if his face was fabricated from cartoon parts.
His name, apparently, is Keith Morrison. Here he is:
He reminded me of someone. Who, though?!
And then, it hit me.
When my parents moved us from Decatur GA to Macon GA when I was in the seventh grade, the local TV station was showing some really bizarre cartoons that weren't run in the Atlanta area. (Yeah, I watched a LOT of TV when I was a kid.) One of those bizarre toons was a piece of shit called CLUTCH CARGO. Sometimes I'd watch it more out of horror than for any other reason. It was one of those-Great Jove! What they fuck were they thinking??!!-kinds of experiences. I'd watch it out of morbid curiosity for a few minutes before wandering off to read a comic or a novel or maybe to take a shit.
At any rate, Keith Morrison, it occurred to me, looked just like Clutch-fucking-Cargo. Here's Mr. Cargo:
It's just fucking uncanny is what it is.
Reporting from the madhouse known as the USA, this is James R. Smith.
"We welcome you to Munchkin Land..."