Friday, February 19, 2016

Glassy Eyed

Don't you hate it when you meet someone and you're hitting it off really well and then they say something so bizarre or so horrible or so totally insane that it strikes you dumb? This happens to me more often than I care to say, and usually my reaction is to go all silent and glassy-eyed. I quite frankly don't know what to say in such a situation.

Well...scratch that. I do know what to say, but to say it would contravene the gentlemanly precepts with which I was raised as a working class southerner.

Here are a few such actual moments paraphrased here:

Me: "So, how did you come to move from the United Kingdom to the USA?"

Person: "Well, my father was fascinated with Scientology and wanted to find out more about it, so he sent me here to California to research it while he stayed in Scotland to run his physician's practice."

And this one:

Me: "You don't actually watch that clown Glenn Beck, do you?!"

Person: "Well...his charts do make a lot of sense, you know."

Or this:

Me: "What do you mean by 'nature finds a balance'?"

Asshole: "The National Parks don't need wolf reintroduction. They'll just decimate the elk populations."

Which led to me to understand that doctors are nothing more than glorified, overpaid mechanics. (Because, yes, all of those were remarks from doctors or, in the first one, about a physician.)

"And sometimes a brain can be trapped in the wrong body. A-HENH!"


Rick Grimes said...

What can be worse is when they stare back glassy eyed at what I'm saying.

James Robert Smith said...

Actually...I get that a lot.